Socially awkward là gì

Medically reviewed by Janet Brilớn, Ph.D., LCSW, CST — Written by Crystal Raypole on November 18, 2019

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Social norms & cues, such as knowing when khổng lồ say hello or giving people personal space, help you navigate social situations. You might have sầu been directly taught some of these norms. Others, you might’ve picked up on by watching others.

When you witness someone fumbling one of these norms, you might cringe internally và feel embarrassed for the other person. Likewise, you probably feel your stomach turn over when you botch an introduction khổng lồ someone new or slip up on your words.

But social awkwardness doesn’t have sầu to be a bad thing. In fact, it might even benefit you in some ways. But that doesn’t make it any less distressing in the moment.

Here’s a look at signs of social awkwardness, tips for overcoming it, và reasons why it might not be such a negative sầu thing.


How vì chưng I know if I’m socially awkward?

Social awkwardness isn’t a mental health issue — there’s no diagnostic criteria or even a concrete definition. It’s more of a feeling, or a collection of feelings và experiences that size a pattern in your life.

These feelings & experiences often result from:

failure to lớn notice certain social cuesmisunderstanding or not noticing others’ body toàn thân language

Heidi McKenzie, PsyD, explains that socially awkward people might have a hard time navigating conversations or working their way into lớn a group. As a result, they might seem a bit “off” khổng lồ others.

It can be hard to lớn recognize social awkwardness in yourself because you might not even be aware of some of the social cues you aren’t picking up on. Instead, you might just notice that you don’t seem lớn fit in with your peers


Is it bad?

Social awkwardness, in itself, isn’t a bad thing.

But it can become problematic if it leads to lớn dibao tay due to:

people making unkind remarksspending a lot of time wondering if you’ve done something wrongfrequently having trouble in social situationswanting to lớn make friends but struggling lớn connect with othersfeeling rejected by others

In a perfect world, everyone would recognize that people are chất lượng và have sầu different skill sets. But in reality, this doesn’t always happen.

This can be tough lớn face. But it doesn’t mean you need to lớn change who you are. Social situations may not be your area of strength, but there are things you can vày lớn minimize your ức chế around these scenarios (more on this later).


Does it serve any purpose?

Before getting inlớn strategies lớn overcome social awkwardness, it’s important to underst& that social awkwardness has a few upsides.

Internal warning system

If you find yourself in an awkward situation, you might think something along the lines of, “This isn’t what I thought would happen.” You might feel a little uneasy or uncomfortable và have sầu the urge to get away as soon as possible.

But a small 2012 study suggests these very feelings can help by acting as a warning system of sorts. They help you realize when you’ve approached (or crossed) a social boundary.

As a result, you might experience physical symptoms of anxiety, panic, or fear, including:

muscle tensionflushed facepounding heartnausea

This probably doesn’t sound beneficial at all. But this discomfort can motivate you to:

take action in the momenttake care lớn avoid missing similar social cues in the future

Deep conversation skills

Having a hard time with small talk and routine social interactions doesn’t mean you aren’t a good conversation partner.

Mackenzie notes that people who khuyễn mãi giảm giá with social awkwardness “may struggle with small talk, but they’re often great at diving deep inkhổng lồ topics they’re passionate about.”

Unique perspectives

Psychologist Ty Tashiro notes in his book Awkward: The Science of Why We’re Socially Awkward và Why That’s Awesome that socially awkward people tend to lớn view the world around them in different ways.

They may be less likely to lớn notice social cues or pick up on emotions but feel more driven toward systematic or scientific approaches. This quality perspective sầu may stem from differences in the brain — differences that sometimes relate to lớn high intelligence & achievement, according to Tashiro.

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“Awkward people’s minds tend lớn make them natural scientists because they are good at seeing details, picking up on patterns in these details, & taking a systematic approach khổng lồ problems,” he writes.


Social awkwardness can have sầu its benefits, but you might notice some drawbacks, too. Perhaps you often feel misplaced or lượt thích you’re missing something. Or maybe you sometimes vì or say things that create awkwardness at trang chính, school, or work.

These tips can help you better navigate social situations và giảm giá khuyến mãi with the repercussions that come from inevitable slip-ups.

Dive sầu deep

Spending a little time learning more about social awkwardness might help you feel more accepting of this part of yourself

Not sure where khổng lồ start? Try visiting your library or bookstore. There are a range of books on this topic that offer interesting explorations of what social awkwardness is and isn’t, along with helpful guidance.



Remember that awkward situations happen lớn everyone

Social awkwardness happens, probably more than you realize. While there aren’t any statistics to lớn bachồng this up, it’s pretty safe to lớn assume most of the people you meet in your daily life have sầu experienced awkward moments of their own.

Say you drop all the groceries you were carrying in the middle of the supermarket. A jar of pasta sauce breaks, eggs smash, & cherry tomatoes roll out their carton và across the aisle. Every fiber of your being is internally screaming & telling you to abandon your groceries and run out the door.

But try khổng lồ remember: You definitely aren’t the first person khổng lồ vày this in that particular store. Nor are you the last. And everyone who turned to lớn look? They’ve likely been there before in some khung or another.

Face awkwardness head-on

When faced with an awkward moment, whether you’ve sầu made a social blunder or simply witnessed someone else’s, you’ll typically react in one of two ways:

avoid or ignore what happenedaddress the mistake

The small study discussed earlier concluded that avoiding or ignoring an awkward situation doesn’t help. Instead, this tends to just prolong the awkwardness and make future interactions even more uncomfortable.

The next time you realize you’ve done something awkward, try acknowledging it with a casual remark or joke instead of withdrawing.

This is a tip you can pay forward, too, if you want to lớn help someone else feel better about an awkward moment. Try a smile or kind remark like, “Don’t worry about it! It happens lớn everyone.”

Practice interacting with others

If you struggle in social settings, you might find it helpful to practice conversation và communication skills with someone you know and trust.

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Communication involves things like:

knowing how khổng lồ start a conversationrecognizing when a conversation is overchanging the subject smoothlyknowing when to lớn interject and how lớn avoid interrupting someone

But good communication also involves knowing how to lớn read someone’s body toàn thân language. This can help you recognize cues lượt thích discomfort, boredom, interest, and so on.

You can practice interacting with others by:

taking social skills classesasking friends or other people you trust for advice & suggestionsrunning through practice scenarios with friends or familyputting yourself into more social situations

Try to lớn stay present

Mindfulness techniques help you pay more attention to what’s happening in the here và now. Being more mindful as you go about your day can help you stay focused on your present surroundings.

This can help reduce awkward moments in two ways:

If you’re more tuned in to lớn what’s happening around you, you’re less likely khổng lồ miss cues from others that might warn you about a possible mishap, lượt thích venting frustrations about a co-worker who’s walking up behind you.Increasing your awareness in the present moment can help you avoid thinking too much about awkward moments that have sầu already happened. Instead, you might find it easier to lớn let them go và move forward.

Again, there’s nothing wrong with social awkwardness. But it’s important to pay attention to how it makes you feel.

If you feel unhappy, distressed, or lonely in your daily life, you might want to consider talking to lớn a therapist who can help you explore the reasons for these feelings. They can also help you develop new social skills & sharpen your self-identity.

A therapist can also help you identify underlying issues that might be playing a role, such as social anxiety. McKenzie explains that, while some people use the terms “social awkwardness” & “social anxiety” interchangeably, they’re two different things.

“People with social anxiety typically have sầu average khổng lồ above-average social skills,” she says. “You might feel lượt thích everyone at the cocktail các buổi party thinks you’re ‘weird,’ but odds are good that you’re coming off just fine khổng lồ others.”

This anxiety can make you withdraw from certain social situations or just avoid them altogether.


Chuyên mục: Kiến thức